tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5160381109996491098.post4144726289485541323..comments2024-01-02T06:57:26.352-05:00Comments on Life and Love in the Petri Dish: Nothing but time will helpUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger50125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5160381109996491098.post-86615919989679085522012-03-14T12:28:19.106-04:002012-03-14T12:28:19.106-04:00Thinking of you. I second the Doppler. It saved my...Thinking of you. I second the Doppler. It saved my sanity. And I used it nearly every single day until I could feel consistent movement--and sometimes after just because I liked the sound. :-)<br /><br />Do what you need to do to get through this. There's no right or wrong.Heatherhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07687848140471196822noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5160381109996491098.post-19046740267695143612012-03-14T11:50:14.251-04:002012-03-14T11:50:14.251-04:00You are doing amazing Mo. Everyone in your shoes ...You are doing amazing Mo. Everyone in your shoes would be terrified, only a crazy person wouldn't, you are doing great taking it day by day. I pray this little one stays in there all 9 months.kharinihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06760406074795967083noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5160381109996491098.post-42798957386044331952012-03-14T10:20:01.005-04:002012-03-14T10:20:01.005-04:00thinking of you mo...
u/s tomorrow? hoping for al...thinking of you mo...<br />u/s tomorrow? hoping for all the good things for you.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5160381109996491098.post-24635846431597168692012-03-13T22:18:41.129-04:002012-03-13T22:18:41.129-04:00I hope the next few weeks go by quickly and you co...I hope the next few weeks go by quickly and you come out the other side more hopeful with an ongoing pregnancy. Nothing will make this time easier. Bloodwork is pretty useless at this point. If I manage to get pg again, I'm sure I'll be sneaking frequent peeks on my U/S at work to keep my mind at ease. <br />There's no shame in getting ultrasounds for reassurance if it will help keep you sane. Sounds like you're doing a good job of that yourself so far.Katehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15805727250430361509noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5160381109996491098.post-32523074465334176062012-03-13T19:52:45.722-04:002012-03-13T19:52:45.722-04:00Thinking of you each day- counting the days as the...Thinking of you each day- counting the days as they go by and cheering you on each day!!!Peacheshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18380127407414987492noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5160381109996491098.post-49638663356111795162012-03-13T14:03:42.144-04:002012-03-13T14:03:42.144-04:00I haven't been by recently but just wanted to ...I haven't been by recently but just wanted to say how excited I was to read about last week's ultra-sound! I think you're right about the time. For me, it was the only thing that really helped my frame of mind. It was a process of one-foot-in-front-of-the-other, one-day-at-a-time.<br /><br />What have you heard back from the miscarriage wizard about your immune tests? Are your NK cells staying low? What about the cytokines? <br /><br />Keeping everything crossed that this little baby sticks around to meet you in nine months!Julizehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04616005510022009796noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5160381109996491098.post-47722207010528159032012-03-13T11:38:19.584-04:002012-03-13T11:38:19.584-04:00Oh Mo, this is such a hard place to be. I can only...Oh Mo, this is such a hard place to be. I can only imagine how stressful this waiting is for you. I think it is very wise of you to recognize that another beta or ultrasound would only help temporarily. But if it would help you to have weekly ultrasounds, I say do it. Don't let anyone make you feel silly. You have been down one hell of a road to get here and you have legitimate reasons to be scared out of your mind, with all that you have been through. <br /><br /><br />Definitely rent or borrow or buy a good doppler in a few weeks. I rented one at 11 weeks from babybeats and couldn't find the heartbeat the night before my NT scan and TOTALLY freaked out even though I knew it was a little early. It took me a while to figure out where to look for the heartbeat, and sometimes it took a long time to find it, but that reassurance was beautiful. I still have it, now at 24 weeks, I check every 3 or 4 days because this little one does not kick a lot. I will be keeping it to the very end, just for reassurance. I had a few days with Birdie where she didn't move much toward the end of my pregnancy and I was so scared that she had died. <br /><br />I hope that the next few weeks go by quickly and uneventfully! There are so, so many people pulling for you guys!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5160381109996491098.post-67627234804600170082012-03-13T09:59:17.915-04:002012-03-13T09:59:17.915-04:00Your right fear is normal and good for you allowin...Your right fear is normal and good for you allowing yourself to feel it. Take good care of yourself. Distracting yourself with things you enjoy can really help the time go by. I read a lot of trashy novels those first couple months.nurslouisahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15749921400852799303noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5160381109996491098.post-67187307095035497852012-03-13T09:58:25.114-04:002012-03-13T09:58:25.114-04:00I pray that that this flicker of life carries on f...I pray that that this flicker of life carries on for months to come, so that you may meet face-to-face, in a very happy time. Hold on...minute by minute...to any peace you can.Brendahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11096628572640730109noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5160381109996491098.post-64864850293871760402012-03-13T07:02:57.013-04:002012-03-13T07:02:57.013-04:00It is so impressive that you're allowing yours...It is so impressive that you're allowing yourself to feel what you're feeling, and that you're facing the fear and terror head-on. You are incredibly brave, and honest with yourself, and I love that about you.<br /><br />Our situation was very different, but still I lived in fear of losing them the entire pg and until they left the NICU. It is normal after so many losses and with a high-risk pregnancy to guard your heart, to be anxious, and to only believe it is truly real when you hold your baby in your arms. <br /><br />Time doesn't heal wounds, but I do believe it'll help ease your fears as you go past the weeks of every previous loss, and as you reach every pregnancy milestone.What IF?https://www.blogger.com/profile/17296831848220411473noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5160381109996491098.post-55884520510393669742012-03-13T05:01:48.728-04:002012-03-13T05:01:48.728-04:00I think fear is inevitable and you are very sensib...I think fear is inevitable and you are very sensible to accept that. Also though it is handy to talk yourself off the ledge sometimes - just because living at that level of fear is really exhausting!<br /><br />My pregnancy so far has been a mixture of fear, resignation to failure, extreme joy and total excitement. As long as you occasionally feel the last two (and these get more prominent the more time passes) then you've got some balance.<br /><br />But really you are right - time is your answer and you'll be amazed how slow and at the same time fast it can go. xClaire https://www.blogger.com/profile/12150226708200368725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5160381109996491098.post-62776219216887122202012-03-13T01:11:37.740-04:002012-03-13T01:11:37.740-04:00<3 Hang in there. <3<3 Hang in there. <3jenicinihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16361606793108116475noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5160381109996491098.post-7201387254473499912012-03-12T22:42:45.929-04:002012-03-12T22:42:45.929-04:00There is a great organization called Tiny Heartbea...There is a great organization called Tiny Heartbeats (www.tinyheartbeats.org). Their mission is to "provide fetal monitors to pregnant women who have previously been through fetal miscarriage, fetal demise, ectopic pregnancy or stillbirths, lost a child to complications from pregnancy, or those women in high risk pregnancies." <br /><br />After six miscarriages, I strongly relied on my doppler to provide much needed sanity checks. But still, my first question at my daughter's birth was "Is she alive?" Gratefully, she was and is a crazy, climbing toddler today. I send you all the strength and crutches and tools you can use to get through every spiralling panic.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5160381109996491098.post-55384901353180913792012-03-12T22:03:53.518-04:002012-03-12T22:03:53.518-04:00Although I didn't experience the losses that y...Although I didn't experience the losses that you have, I did finally get pregnant at CCRM after failed IVFs previously, so I do understand some of the anxiety you're feeling. No matter what, don't let anybody tell you that you're being "ridiculous" or too anxious during your pregnancy - because NOBODY understands how you feel and what you've been through, and you have every right to do all the "ridiculous" things you need to do, to keep yourself sane. I even drove 2 hours, twice a week during my first trimester to get ultrasounds from a friend who's an OB. And I'm sure she probably thought I was crazy, but really, who cares. Because having peace of mind and being able to relax has to be good for your baby! So do whatever it takes. Somebody mentioned the doppler... I definitely recommend it as well! At 10 weeks though... not sooner. And if you have to keep it in your glove compartment like I did, to check on your baby multiple times during the day while you're at work, don't feel bad about that either! :)Deanahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07799853002356302789noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5160381109996491098.post-57985387027796340652012-03-12T21:57:36.262-04:002012-03-12T21:57:36.262-04:00Oh gosh I so remember this feeling. And you are r...Oh gosh I so remember this feeling. And you are right, time is the only thing that will help. Each minute, day, week is a milestone at this point. It is hard to celebrate, so just keep breathing and try not to overanalyze if you can. <br /><br />When you start having doubts, stop the story in your head. Just actively tell yourself that you are still here and until proven otherwise, which may never ever come, you ARE still pregnant.<br /><br />Little flicker and all...you are still pregnant.<br /><br />Hugs to you!!!Mrs. Joneshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11304487980489984413noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5160381109996491098.post-9515959714414010662012-03-12T20:20:11.014-04:002012-03-12T20:20:11.014-04:00Thinking of you my friend. Hoping that time does ...Thinking of you my friend. Hoping that time does pass and that you are able to find peace and enjoy this pregnancy. You are in my thoughts!Patiencehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13304353080919620549noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5160381109996491098.post-21748932770526127252012-03-12T18:19:44.416-04:002012-03-12T18:19:44.416-04:00Yup -that sounds exactly right to me. You and the...Yup -that sounds exactly right to me. You and the fear will get to know each other quite well and it will ebb and flow. Sounds like a little DBT is in order here- the whole "You can't stop the waves but you can learn how to surf" business. Keep surfing, Mo. Moment by moment.Daniellehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03775571361470043724noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5160381109996491098.post-62542872218028117262012-03-12T18:12:49.747-04:002012-03-12T18:12:49.747-04:00It DOES get easier in some ways - especially once ...It DOES get easier in some ways - especially once you start feeling movement (though that can be another thing to panic about on occasions). Like you, I had 6 losses and, like you, I was terrified. I think I had a little more faith than I had done in the past because our pregnancy number 7 was through donor eggs. BUT my two best supporters during our losses (from our Miscarriage Association support group) also finally got their take-home babies - who were genetically theirs - one after 6 losses and one after 7! And the one who lost 7 now has 2 kids. It CAN work out.Silverhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15524066274559867949noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5160381109996491098.post-15238252957307583582012-03-12T17:54:42.146-04:002012-03-12T17:54:42.146-04:00After your positive heart beat scan I was going to...After your positive heart beat scan I was going to ask what the furthest along you'd ever been and add that it wouldn't be likely that you'd have your first exhale until you passed that point and then likely not until you entered your 2nd trimester.<br /><br />I fully recommend renting a fetal Doppler at some point. After so many losses, I too, was completely uneasy during most of my pregnancy. The Doppler reassured me in a way that nothing else could have. And, it bonded me to my son in a way that still makes me teary thinking about. <br /><br />Good luck! You ARE doing it!It Is What It Ishttp://itiswhatitisorisit.net/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5160381109996491098.post-64808433782806959322012-03-12T16:59:16.727-04:002012-03-12T16:59:16.727-04:00You guys could buy an ultrasound machine! :-).
Y...You guys could buy an ultrasound machine! :-). <br />You are right though, only time will tell! Praying time flies!Kristinahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01291857992423590623noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5160381109996491098.post-44965952425618194042012-03-12T16:11:58.323-04:002012-03-12T16:11:58.323-04:00For what its worth, I think you are doing great. N...For what its worth, I think you are doing great. No one can blame you for feeling the way you do after everything that you have gone through. I am constantly amazed at your strength. We are all pulling for you!Trishahttp://theelusivesecondline.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5160381109996491098.post-63480371585011436692012-03-12T15:34:42.711-04:002012-03-12T15:34:42.711-04:00You are absolutely right, only time will help and ...You are absolutely right, only time will help and even then until that baby is in your arms you might not be completely convinced that this can turn out ok. But that's fine, this is your reality and whatever it takes to get you through each day successfully sounds like a perfect plan!<br /><br />And perhaps you can do what I did to ensure I had an ultrasound every 2 weeks until I was into my 3rd trimester (yes, I was that paranoid my pregnancy would end like my others). I scheduled alternate visits with my OB and MFM, so I really only saw them once a month but on alternate 2 week schedules. And they were willing to accomodate my need for a quick scan. I hope yours is as well!Carmhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17791963221400127496noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5160381109996491098.post-52830466458227575922012-03-12T15:12:28.033-04:002012-03-12T15:12:28.033-04:00I'm glad you're being so gentle with yours...I'm glad you're being so gentle with yourself. And I haven't been through anything like you (just a couple chemical pregnancies and a late miscarriage), but with this pregnancy I was really scared until I got past the point where I had miscarried the time before. Then the fear didn't entirely go away, but it lessened A LOT. I hope this happens for you as well.<br />Praying for everything to go perfectly for you these next 3 weeks and beyond...Kristenhttp://www.buckupbuttercup.netnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5160381109996491098.post-23608102837744242872012-03-12T14:50:37.381-04:002012-03-12T14:50:37.381-04:00I think it's great that you're giving your...I think it's great that you're giving yourself permission to freak out as much as you want, as well as take any steps to reassure yourself. A very sensible approach given what you have been through.<br /><br />These next few weeks are going to be tough, and I hope you get through them as smoothly as possible. Let the time pass quickly!newbiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02779719410948226318noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5160381109996491098.post-57674119187696278602012-03-12T14:24:34.217-04:002012-03-12T14:24:34.217-04:00Acceptance is a wonderful place to be. I'm jus...Acceptance is a wonderful place to be. I'm just about there myself. I'm not excited about my pregnancy. I haven't told anyone other than immediate family. I don't fantisize and rub my belly. I've been feeling guilt about this and now I realize I'm waiting. I'm waiting for tomorrow and our NT scan, I'm waiting until viability, I'm waiting to get to a gestational age where there is little chance of negative effects from prematurity, I'm waiting to be sure there is no birth trauma. Until then I'll gradually work up to my excitement. Acceptance is a wonderful place to be while you wait.Chris and Joyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14468062077362257061noreply@blogger.com