In a recent conversation with the RE, I was asking if there was any way he could give me a higher dose of stims this upcoming cycle (yes, this is how pathetic it's gotten), while simultaneously apologizing that I must sound like a drug-seeking patient ("More drugs, doctor, please, more!") and ha ha isn't that funny since there is not one iota of pleasure that comes from these drugs. He laughed and said at least I could have my few minutes of pleasure from the anesthesia during the egg retrieval.
"But I'm asleep during the egg retrieval! It's not pleasurable at all!" I told him earnestly.
Well, come to find out, "you may be more awake than you think."
Um, Ok.
The RE went on to tell me about one patient who throughout the retrieval and following kept saying she should have stayed with her ex-boyfriend, who at least had good sperm (apparently her husband had male factor issues). The RE said they kept her in recovery, away from her loving and unsuspecting husband, until she was wide awake and in control of her faculties.
Later, the RE told her what she had been saying, and she said, "I hated that SOB - I'd never want to be back with him! My husband didn't hear me, did he?" She was assured, that no, her husband had not heard her.
I try to remind myself that they've seen it all. Whatever shocking behavior I could come up with must be boring to them. Of course, when I said this to the RE, he smiled, and said, "You'd be surprised."
Egads! Who knows what I've been saying during these multiple retrievals!
Figures that I'd be amnestic for the one bit of euphoria during this crappy process.
Thoughts on your potential behavioral pitfalls while disinhibited on meds? Pray tell, any actual stories?
Mo
There was one ER that I realized partway through that I was actually talking to the anestheologist (the specialty I can't spell but I so dearly love... don't they have all the good drugs!). I came back to myself mid sentence. I think I was asking him where he went to school or something which is fairly mild. I believe I bad mouthed my old RE as well when my new was mentioning to him how I had a high tolerance for pain but it was no excuse for my old RE to take a polyp from my uterus without any pain meds and fully awake. I am hoping I didn't say anything too racy! I do wonder though. I suppose we are sort of on autopilot. The thing is I talk in my sleep to so I've said god knows what to a lot of people. Roommates always got a kick out of it.
ReplyDeletethis last time i only got 2.5 of versed, so i remember the whole thing. at one point they said that they had to go back through the left vaginal wall to get at some stuff on the back of the ovary, but that they would give me extra pain meds. they did, waited a minute, then did a countdown. the thing was: they said, "one...two..." then put the needle through. i said, "you didn't say three!! you were supposed to say three, THEN do it!" everyone thought i was so funny. i was just trying to tell them that i really wasn't ready! ;)
ReplyDeleteOh my, that is hilarious. I laughed outloud, reading it and just read it to DH(who does have severe mfi) and he laughed too.
ReplyDeleteI can't imagine what I may have done. Yikes.
I do say many odd things in half-sleep. Dh loves it.
It's so funny that you mention this. I was just having this conversation with our IVF nurse yesterday. Here's what I told her:
ReplyDeleteDH plays World of Warcraft, which I think is an infernal game. Our compromise is that I have the password to the parental controls. So, I can make it red (no play) or green (play) on a schedule that we agree on. I told the nurse under no circumstances was anyone to ask me the password! What a great opportunity it would be for him to get it!
She thought I was kidding. :)
Oh no, I say odd things awake! I can't imagine what will come out of my mouth during my retrieval! LOL
ReplyDeleteKami
Unfortunately, for my first egg retrieval, I was wide awake. So much so that DH was in the room with me, and we argued with the RE to GET the eggs off of my left ovary, which he didn't want to do because it was "hard to get to." With only 7 total eggs that cycle. I got to watch it all on the ultrasound screen, the eggs going into the catheter and the flushing of the ovaries. It was amazing, but painful...
ReplyDeleteWith this one, I was *almost* out. I remember lots of pressure, asking for more meds, hearing them count the eggs(or SOMETHING, because 12 wasn't the number, but that's what I kept on hearing) but that's about it. I'm sure it's interesting to hear what goes on in the retrievals, though!
In your case, I think I'd be so curious I'd have to ask the RE if I'd said anything wildly inappropriate or funny. Of course, my RE is so funny and open, he'd probably joke around with DH and I if I'd ever said anything really funny.
They didn't knock us out at our clinic... for me the drugs that they did give weren't very effective. So I didn't say anything because the pain was excruciating.
ReplyDeleteGood luck with your jouney
ICLW
I never thought about this before. I know I will say something embarassing. I can barely control what I say when I'm awake.
ReplyDeleteI feel like I've been completely asleep through all 5 retrievals, but after reading your post, who knows what the reality is! I do know that on a couple of occasions, after getting the happy drug, I've told the doctor "Ok, now I'm going to giggle" before passing out. Not sure I want to find out what I did after I passed out!
ReplyDeleteOh my. That totally freaks me out. I have a big mouth and I put my foot in it all the time even when I'm totally coherent...
ReplyDeleteOMG! That is funny. I hope whatever I say is at least entertaining.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the comment. ICLW
Yep, it's apparently an altered form of consciouness where we are sorta awake, sorta asleep, My doc said they give you something to make you forget though. My nurse told me I said, "Ahhh! Cool & refreshing when they swabbed the betadine." Another time I was apparently going on about the very prominent family I tutor for & my anestheologist knew them!
ReplyDeleteI bet they hear some crazy stuff. The nurse told me if they do anything on anyone with high security clearance, they have to be briefed or something afterwards. Weird!
FUNNY ! I say such dumb stuff when I'm AWAKE that I'd hate to see what would happen in such a situation !
ReplyDeleteOh, I know I've said some unsavory things on my way in and out of anesthesia. I just hope I don't say anything around the person I'm talking about. :-P
ReplyDeleteOh that's great. So even when we think we're asleep we could actually be nattering on about some humiliating thing? Perfect! I do know that for my retrieval I have absolutely no memories of anything after putting my legs in the stirrups, but for my D&E I definitely distinctly remember portions of it (I do regret recalling that I told the fellow and the nurse that the disposable underwear they'd given me was not cute enough -- that it needed some lace or bows on it).
ReplyDeleteI did my retrieval sober.
ReplyDeleteNo drugs :)
No funny talk, either ;)
J
I love versed ..on the receiving and giving end. It's always fun. My personal horror story was having a colleague that I was very close to and had a tremendous secret crush on for years do a procedure on me. When I woke up, he told me to check my pockets when my husband wasn't around. I got home, reached in my pocket and found a prescription with "I love you too. A lot." written on it. I could have died.
ReplyDeleteyikes!!! who knows!!! all I know is that when I came out of the first one I thought they said they could only find 3 sperm, yes 3, from Mr. M's PESA but the news was worse - they only got 3 eggs from me...I wonder if I snore.
ReplyDeletehmm I was awake during egg retrieval and it hurt like HELL, there was some pain killers but it didn't do the trick :)
ReplyDeleteAfter my last one, I just kept asking the nurses "did you get them all? sometimes they are tricky to find and you have to push on my ovary. are you sure you got them all?"
ReplyDeleteThe one nurse said I made her day...quite the entertainer I am.
LMAO! The girl tlaking about her ex-boyfriend is too funny! Thank God they kept her in recovery longer!
ReplyDeleteI don't have any personal stories, but I know of one bloger who said she always sings random songs while she's under for ER. Her doc and nurses love her for the entertainment she provides! Too funny! Good luck!
Are you kidding me? I had no idea that we weren't totally "out." Saying something inappropriate is now another thing I can put on my plate of worry...
ReplyDeleteOh man. I did not need to know about this.
ReplyDeleteI've been through FOUR egg retrievals, and I always love that first millisecond of anesthesia before I went out...although now who the heck knows what really happened since I probably wasn't all the way out. Geez. Nothing like anesthesia in the stirrups :)
I wasn't out for my ER and I remember the pain. They just gave me moderate sedation and kept adding more because of the pain I was in.
ReplyDeleteI do remember though that for a different surgery I had, years ago, as my left arm was sticking out to the side of an operating table, it seems I had said that I thought I looked like the Statue of Liberty. Which made no sense, cause I bet there was no resemblance at all, except in my drugged state of mind. But the doctors thought it was pretty funny.
I'm a doctor, and I had to have hand surgery a few years back - I opted for just a nerve block and no sedation for this very reason! Sure, I was fully awake and smelling and hearing all the awful things they were doing to my hand, but no crazy confessions to the surgeon and anesthesiologist!
ReplyDeleteBisous