When Mo and I were at the RE for our latest second opinion, he showed us this enormous chart showing various statistical endpoints for centers around the US. Both of us leaned forward like researchers being shown a secret code. Instead, it was just a bunch of numbers. It was then that I realized that while all of our research has been extremely useful, in the end it can point to the direction we should take, but there will be no "ah-hah" moment.
I like what this RE said. There is no stone uncovered. There is no "right" answer. Ultimately, we need to find a physician we respect and feel comfortable with. In his opinion, that is the right answer. Given our experiences thus far with our center and doctor, that is reassuring.
So, we will forge ahead with a new cycle. With another expert opinion under our belt, it is nice to know that we don't have our head in the sand. Our current RE said he doesn't forecast chances of success/failure past the current cycle and I guess we won't either.
Will
Yes, exactly. Statistics describe the experience of populations, you are individuals. As one of my REs said to me once, you personally are either going to end up 100% pregnant or 0% pregnant. Of course, as I've since learned there are nuances even to that ... getting pregnant isn't actually the end goal, just a step along the way (as I know the two of you are painfully aware). Still, the basic point holds ... it happens or it doesn't; you can work to improve your chances, but an improbable outcome is no less (un)happy because of its improbability.
ReplyDeleteI always hated statistics. I work in Oncology. EVERYTHING there is a statistic, yet, everyday someone breaks the mold. Like the previous poster said, you are individuals. And, from the sounds of it, you've got a wonderful medical team working with you; that seem to be treating you as individuals. Thinking about you as you forge ahead with this cycle!
ReplyDeleteAhh, statistics ... I have a love/hate relationship with them. As my husband likes to say the numbers matter when you are on the right side of them, but unfortunately all too often most of us are on the wrong side of them. As a result they are meaningless to us.
ReplyDeleteAs you know so much in medicine is beyond our control and is unexplainable, so in my opinion trusting and respecting your doctor is of utmost importance. You have to be able to sleep at night knowing that the person who is caring for you is making the best decisions for you, is on your side, and wants nothing more than to help you have a child. I'm happy to hear that you and Mo are forging ahead with another cycle. I will be thinking of you and wishing you all the best!
I'm coming over from Kami's blog and wanted to wish you luck on your journey. :) You've been through so much. I'm so sorry. (((HUGS)))
ReplyDeleteTammy
www.twondra.blogspot.com
I like the RE's philosophy.
ReplyDelete