Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Decision made

Will and I have gone back and forth between wanting to proceed straight to FET or choosing to get another cycle under our belts before we put back our wonky blasts. Round and round and round we have gone...

Well, we finally reached the Denver nurses today and discussed the options of proceeding straight to FET v. cycling again.

Dr. Schl. wants us to do two months of lupron (blech!) before transferring our frozen blasts because I have stage III endo and some other lining issues, so it will be three months down the line before we could do an FET...which seems like light-years away.

On the other hand, if we wanted to squeeze another fresh cycle in first (basically, if we are masochists), we were told we can basically do that immediately, which was a surprise. Immediately as in, my period is due to arrive today or tomorrow and they were willing to work me into the schedule to cycle THIS MONTH. That's, um, really right away.

Because we've lost any and all good sense that God gave us at this point, we almost jumped on that. But it actually turned out to be pretty intensely crazy, because it would mean me missing three classes, plus a week of work, plus my doctoral graduation ceremony. Not to mention, it would mean last-minute anxieties and sorting of all kinds of things so that we could jump on a plane in mid-May.

So Will and I thought about it. And sorted through our meager finances. And thought some more. And we swallowed hard and decided to do a fresh cycle in June. And then a frozen transfer in September (after the two months of dreaded lupron).

I hate waiting around, but have tried to tell myself that Mo, thirty days of waiting is really a drop in the bucket at this point. By waiting a month, I'll have a chance to clean up my diet, start taking a bunch o' supplements Dr. Schl. recommended, do some acupuncture, etc. And while all this probably won't affect things in any way, at least it will feel like I'm doing my part to try to get the best results we can.

Because really, IVF #7 has to be our last IVF, right? Right?! Geesh. (I wonder what the IVF world record is? I'm sure it's way more than 7, but how many do people do?)

Hopefully, we're making a good decision. Hopefully.


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  1. I am glad you have a plan. I hope things go well this time around and you have more normal blasts.

    I am sure it is way more than 7. Our next IVF will be #7 and I am willing to go at least 3 more this time around if we can swing the finances.

    2 Months of lupron sounds like pure torture :(

  2. I applaud you guys for making this sound decision. It's always a good thing to take your time to really make up your mind, weighing the pros and cons of each choice. You are Will are nothing if not smart, level-headed people. On that note, I'm so glad you have a plan and a timeline now! Something to really look forward to!

  3. I *love* a plan. I always feel better with a plan. And June in CO sounds lovely.

  4. YAY for a decision- and
    good for you for stepping away from the RIGHT NOW option that would have caused undue stress. As if, somehow, you have not had quite enough.

    and you, my dear, take care of YOU.

    you asked for more pics of our event so I am going to sneak in a link here to my amazing photographer's blog.

    we're near the top. holy crap they are the most amazing photos ever. Wish my skin looked like that! All glowy. Not so much.

    anyway, congratulations on a plan, it helps (me) knowing what is next. And I will simply be keeping my fingers crossed in every way for you for the next cycle in June. Let's hear it for a plethora of more normal embryos! Siblings and options!

    thinking of you,

  5. It does sound a bit crazy when you put it like that but a month out sounds just perfect.

    I have a friend who had ........wait for this......... 13 IVFs and finally conceived her twins.

    They're now 16 months old and there's talk of going for number 3.

    I told her she's crazy!!!

    But with the first 13, she said she'd do anything, anything!

  6. Isn't 7 a lucky number?? I am so glad you guys have a plan. I'll be here every step of the way!!!


  7. I think it is a good plan. But I really do not envy you on the depot lupron (it is the depot kind, right?) in the summer. That stuff is awful. But all worth it in the end, right?

    And seven is a lucky number!!

  8. I'm glad you made a decision, and lupron does suck suck suck, but, in the end there is some info out there that says that it helps with implantation calming down everything before transfer? And ye know what is 2 months of lupron in the scale of things (which is what I told myself each month for my recent 12 month stint, what's another month of menopause). For me exercising was the key to not going wacko on lupron.
    so glad that you're no longer in limbo land.

  9. I remember being in the REs office overhearing a woman say that it was her 14th IVF and I thought. NO WAY!! Well, it took 6 until my first son, then 4 more until my twins, and then we thought well, just a couple more tries and that's it forever so we did 2 more, and I'm expecting now. So 12 total, never an FET!

  10. I'm always torn between admiration and horror when I hear about large numbers of IVF attempts. I'm particularly horrified when attempt number umtpy-two is successful, because then I start thinking that this is what I should be doing too - and really, I'm too old and we don't have enough money. When I read about your idea of doing the fresh cycle and then a frozen one shortly after, I didn't skip a beat till I reached the end when I thought "I hope she never needs that frozen cycle", but I know just how you think, for I think the same way!

  11. Such a hard decision. Really glad you have a plan!!

  12. I totally hear where you’re coming from. I’m afraid three CGH normals is more than we’ll ever be able to hope for, but even if I had three in hand, I'd go for it if I thought I had a decent shot at making more (and had the money, of course). Like you, I think I’ve come to expect the worst when it comes to my reproductive outcomes. You can never have too many chances or too much insurance. And a sibling would just be wonderful, wouldn’t it?

    By the way, I’ve also been told that I’m going to have to do the 2 months of Depot Lupron (assuming we have anything to transfer) so I feel your pain. Endo just sucks, doesn’t it?

  13. Glad you have a plan and glad it'll give you some time to do other important things in your life. But really glad you have a plan. I suck at ambiguity of any kind, so the thought of you all being in decision-making limbo for this long? It's been eating at me.

    You wanna celebrate the making-of-the-decision one of these nights?

  14. Congrats on having a decision made and a plan in place. That's huge!

  15. I think Brooke Shields went through 6 or 7 cycles... no wonder she had postpartum after her pregnancy finally made it to birth.
    Anyways, I feel like you and I are in a similar boat. I am vacillating between transferring out frozen 3 or doing another IVF (#5)... i am getting tired and would actually welcome a "rushed" cycle so that I could short-circuit my brain for awhile.

    I think your plan is good and thought out.

    Isn't amazing how every time we seem to draw the proverbial line in the sand it seems that in reality we keep chasing it?

    Thinking of you!!

  16. It is good that you have a plan. Hope the time goes by quickly.

    Come on Lucky #7!!

  17. BOOOOO Lupron! But it did thin out my lining (not in a good way) so it is good for that!


  18. I'm so glad you have a plan. And this plan seems like a really good one...not crazy soon but not far far away either. Best wishes on school and work and everything else in the meantime...

  19. You two are amazing. Really you inspire me to have strength and hope - with all the crap you have have been thru you still approach all of this with intelligence, rationale and faith in each other. I am wishing that 7 is the one for you. 30 days and counting. xx

  20. I've missed some deep posts lately. Your adoption post was very thought-provoking. Wish I had something intelligent to contribute about the subject. The article brought up issues that many of my friends with adopted children have grappled with and overcome, thankfully. It's a tough road, much like IF. Anyone who ever said "why don't you just adopt" to me instantly went on the idiot list. It's an awesome family building option, but not one to be entered into lightly, obviously!

    Glad that you have a plan..sounds like a good one! Enjoy your graduation. I hope that IVF #7 is the lucky cycle for you. :)

  21. I think you have to keep going until whenever is right for you. And I think you're right, this HAS to be your last (successful) IVF!! :)

  22. Sounds like a good plan.

    Yeah ... before starting treatment, I'd hear about people who did, you know, 3 or 4 cycles and think, wow, that's really intense. Now? I'll see your 3 or 4 cycles and raise you 3 canceled transfers and ...

    I don't even know how to count cycles anymore. Cycles that got to transfer? We did 5. Retrieval? 6. Frozen transfers? 2. Additional cycles canceled before transfer but after starting stims? Um ... maybe 4? Just outright canceled, full stop? Uh ... at least 2. (I've been pregnant exactly once, and -- I don't take this lightly -- I have one child).

    Here's hoping your lucky number is coming up.

  23. Must be a relief to have made a decision though. Hope it'll be lucky #7 and bring you lots of nice healthy euploid embryos. So that you can have a baby and then lots of sibilings later on, all from "fresh" young eggs.

  24. Sounds smart. Very smart. Much as I understand the urge not to put this cycle off a month, you and Will have given so much of yourselves to the journey of building a family. I'd hate to see you miss your graduation, which is a celebration of a huge triumph,on top of it. I understand that when you look at it from your current vantage point, now or 30 days from now makes a big difference. But looking backwards from a few years from now, when you will hopefully be far out the other end of this, I don't think the 30 days will loom quite as large.

    And the back to back fresh instead of an FET makes total sense. Can't even think of a compelling counterargument right now.

  25. :)

    f/x for a few more blasties in the freezer!

  26. I think whether you are preparing for ivf #7 or #27 doesn't matter so much.... As long as you still have the desire and strength to do it then go for it I say, only YOU can say how many cycles is enough for you and I think its awesome that you have a plan together. I almost had a cycle buddy in you though as I thought you were going to say that you decided to jump straight into another fresh cycle which would mean we'd be cycling together. I think your decision to dealay is a wise one though, I'm not sure how you feel about back to back ivf cycles but after doing 3 in a row last year I have learnt my personal limits in that department and I'd have made the same decision as you. x

  27. Crazy? Isn't that all relative, considering everything else you have gone through....Keeping everything crossed and sending up big prayers that June will be the final time you have to debate "what to do next?"!!!
    Pulling for you and Will!!!!!!!!!!!

  28. OK, after reading some of the posters mention knowing women who did 13 and 14 cycles...I am starting to feel a LOT better about doing my 8th (11 if you count the 3 I canceled right before transfer). I keep thinking I am crazy. Maybe we are for trying this much. But if I could look into the future and see that if it would take 13 to get a child, I would do it without hesitation. I'd walk through fire to have a child with my own eggs. I'm sure we all would. :-)


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