Transfer complete - with pics!

All went well with the transfer.

My blood results came back well too with progesterone at 24 and estrogen at 2,000 (oh my!)

All three blastocysts survived the thaw 100%. And according to the embryologist, they were all expanded and beginning to hatch!

Here's a pic. We had the embryologist tell us which was which, so I labeled it for you to see.

For comparison, here is the pic from Magpie's transfer. In that case, two survived the thaw 100% and the third 98%, and two of the three had fully expanded. Today's blasts look in much worse shape to me, but then again, I'm no embyologist. Maybe ugly blasts can sometimes go the distance?

And here is the pic from the FET before that, that resulted in a loss at 7 weeks... In that case, All three blasts survived the thaw, with 100% cell survival for two of them and 98% cell survival for the third. One of the three completely re-expanded, and the other two moderately and minimally 

Nothing to do now but wait (and overanalyze...I mean...rest).

Mo

Click here to subscribe

All in: Thoughts on a 7th embryo transfer

Just back from the transfer and resting comfortably on my hotel bed while Will whips up a nice lunch for us. Bed rest has commenced and will end on Saturday morning. Kind of nice to have an imposed rest.

I did acupuncture before and after transfer, which I think helped relax me (along with the 10mg of valium they give you). I was so relaxed, I actually fell asleep during the hour-long lie down following the transfer (Will says I even snored a little). This transfer was much more comfortable than the last one because they didn't make me overfill my bladder. I explained how uncomfortable I was last time and how I can't seem to use a bed pan (all those years of practicing not peeing on myself lying down as a kid, I guess). So the tech actually let me get up and partially empty my bladder twice before the transfer. This made all the difference.

We decided to transfer three blastocysts back. I had six total frozen (five chromosomally normal ones and one no result), so we figured we'd use half on me and save half in the case I need to move forward with the woman who has so generously offered to be a carrier.

For those into the details, the three embryos transferred were of the following qualities:

1. A Day 6 3AB
2. A Day 7 4AB
3. An invitro matured day 7 4AA (was immature at retrieval and so fertilized a day late. Technically this one then is a day 6)

These are all three confirmed chromosomally normal...So with my amateur embryologist hat on, I rate these as seemingly one that looks pretty good (the straight up day 6) and two that are more wild cards (the day 7 and invitro matured one)...

we shall see...

Two survived the thaw 100% and were re-expanded. One survived 98% and hadn't fully expanded, but they said it was on its way. Here's what they looked like up on the screen just prior to transfer (I have highest hopes for the one on the bottom right).

Now to just rest as much as possible and hope that at least one of these guys decides to burrow in to the nice lining I've been working on developing over here...

I can't believe this is my 7th embryo transfer! Please please please let this one be the one.

Mo

Click here to subscribe

Transfer day

Thank you all so much for your good thoughts and well-wishes. They mean more than we can say.

Transfer complete, but not without a few hair-raising moments. First we received a call from the nurse yesterday that the transfer might be cancelled because I potentially misunderstood (still unclear to me) and took the first dose of progesterone a few hours early. Dr. Schl. ended up saying a few hours makes no difference, but it was a real panic situation for about 30 minutes that basically ended up seeming like needless drama from the nurse. That imaginary crisis averted, all systems were again go.

This morning, we were scheduled to arrive at the clinic at 11AM but received a call at 7:30AM to "put on my pants and just get there asap" - apparently all of Dr. Schl's transfers got moved up this morning by several hours. So we hightailed it over there and I had acupuncture and then the standard 10 mg of valium they give to relax you. Mmmmm.

They thawed three CCS and FISH chromosomally normal embryos:

Embryo #5 from June - a 6BA

Embryo #14 from June - a 4BB

and Embryo #6 from March - a 6BB

All survived, with 100% cell survival for two of them and 98% cell survival for the third. One of the three completely re-expanded, and the other two moderately and minimally (but the third one was thawed last in our race to the new transfer time this morning, and so may catch up). The lack of re-expansion on the two (see pic below) scares the bejeezus out of me, but I'm trying to just accept it and hope for the best. Not sure how critical it is. Any of you know?

After spending much time post-transfer trying to pee in a bedpan (boy that was difficult!) and getting a second round of acupuncture, I'm back at hotel and on bed rest until Sunday - planning to snooze a lot after very little sleep last night (nerves) and watch multiple episodes of Mad Men for entertainment. Love that show. Will is as usual being a champ and helping me do everything I need. Such a good husband!

I'm not feeling too hopeful, more just terrified, which is maybe what hope looks and feels like at this stage of the game? Talisman necklace clutched tightly in hand, prayers on my lips. Hoping to find a zen place to settle my mind in soon, but so far somewhat failing.

Here are the Mo and Will threesome below, if you're curious.

Any thoughts on the lack/slowness of re-expansion and what it portends? Any of you btdt with vitrified blasts and had a good or not-good outcome?

More to come soon...

Mo

Click here to subscribe

Transfer report from the petri dish: surprise!

I spent the morning apprehensively working on my dissertation, fearing everytime the phone rang that it would be my RE, telling me he was sorry but the transfer was off because both embryos had arrested. As the morning crept into early afternoon and no call came, I started to relax a little. Looked like we were going to make it to transfer after all, thankfully.

Around 2pm, Will and I arrived at the IVF surgical suite, a mixture of relieved that the transfer hadn't been canceled and a little hangdog that we only had two embryos (at most) to transfer.

I sat in my hospital pajamas trying to distract myself, but not doing a very good job. I kept wondering is it one? is it two? one? two? how fragmented? and on and on. I reminded myself of a couple of stories I know where someone transferred only one and got a baby out of it, and I thought of some of your awesome comments, sharing stories of transferring two and getting pregnant. Thank you for those.

When I got called into the transfer room, my RE was nonchalantly talking about the embryos with his back to me. "All three are looking pretty good," he said, as I looked around behind me to see who else he might have been talking to.

"Three?"

We went round and round. There were definitely three. He didn't know if one fertilized late or if I was just given the wrong information before. I joked that maybe they'd decided to throw in one of somebody else's, just to cut me a break already. No one seemed to find that funny but me.

So there are three - that's 50% more than we were expecting! And the three are now transferred out of their cozy coculture medium and into the real deal - a veritable sea of uterine tissue, not just a few of my cells lining a dish. (One of the RE's described the scale between the embryo and the uterine lining to me as a tennis ball in a football field, which I thought was kind of cool).

My RE said that among these embryos is one that is grade 1 - the highest grade - and that the other two are grade 2. He says I have never produced a grade 1 embryo before. Ever.

Huh.

So without further ado, here they are, all three of them, in their glory: a 9 cell, an 8 cell, and a 7 cell.

Amazing how much different if feels to have three instead of two. I am so grateful. And although I don't want to get ahead of myself after having been disappointed so many times, I am even a little bit hopeful.

Fingers crossed. The two week wait starts now.

Mo

Taking the plunge

We spoke to our doctor, we talked amongst ourselves, we prayed, and finally, we held our breath and took the plunge.

Thank you for all of your thoughts about this decision and for your support. Especially for your support.

We decided to be aggressive (but hopefully not too aggressive).

In making the decision, we weighed Mo's history and age, as well as the fact that any embryos not transferred would almost certainly be discarded, since we've never had any extras make it to blast for freezing. Faced with the uterus or the trash can, we chose the uterus. We also considered the likelihood of miscarriage - there's around a 25% chance of miscarriage with any single embryo that does take hold - and the fact that our miscarriage risk is elevated, given our history of multiple aneuploidies.

We tried to be rational (being trained in science and all), taking in all the info and letting it simmer for awhile. But ultimately, this decision required a huge leap of faith.

So yesterday, around 3pm, we leapt.

And now, everybody is on board:



We are excited. We are terrified. And for the first time since the first IVF, we're actually thinking this might result in a pregnancy or two (or, gulp, three). And maybe even a real live baby (or babies) at the end of it all.

Beta is March 23. Holding our breath a little bit until then.

Mo and Will

Pics from the petri dish: Don't judge an embryo by its cover

So without further ado, here are the three embryos that are hopefully now nuzzling in and taking firm root in my endometrium. One 8-cell, one 7-cell, and one 6-cell.

The bigger circles are the cells. And all that smaller debris is fragmentation, which unfortunately is not such a good thing prognostically (the embryo on the lower right looks especially ominous).

I'm really pulling for these guys to make it. Truly, I am. But I have to say that as the staff handed me the picture and started oohing and ahhing over it in the OR right before the transfer, I was crestfallen.

When my RE had phoned earlier that morning and said, "Three look better than the rest," this was not what I was imagining.

I had pictured each embryo would look like this:

which is to say, perfect and 8-celled with minimal fragmentation.

Will and I joked in the recovery room that if one of these embryos turns out to stick and become a baby, h/she sure won't be winning any beauty contests. Which of course would be just fine. We just want a healthy baby (and we're not exactly winning any contests either, believe me).

And while I am worried and somewhat disappointed, I am also thankful that we have embryos to transfer at all. That we have our health. That we have each other.

I met a woman as I was waiting for the transfer who only had one embryo to transfer and who three months ago lost her baby at 20 wks gestation due to a fatal heart defect. Ugh. And do you know what she said to me? "My husband and I are just grateful that we got to have the pregnancy and feel the baby move inside me. Even if I never get pregnant again, we will always have that to hold on to."

I almost cried. I'm not sure I could ever find the silver lining in such a situation. But I admire her incredibly for doing so.

I am a lesser being, I think, one sometimes filled with fruitless anxiety and angst. That said, I am trying desperately to stay in the moment and remember that things could, just maybe, turn out ok. Just because they haven't before doesn't mean that they won't this time.

The beta is Monday 12/22. What will be will be.

Mo