Talked to Dr. Schl. today for a regroup appointment post-miscarriage. He said that it will be interesting to see if the baby was chromosomally normal or not once the cytogenetics come back from the D&C...um, yeah. I'd say it'll be interesting... he also reminded me that our microarray tests had a quoted 90% accuracy rate. He says that if the genetics come back normal, that would "change (my) history and complicate the picture but wouldn't necessarily indict (my) uterus." He says many women have one unexplained miscarriage. Most of my other losses were confirmed chromosomally abnormal (in fact, every one that we have had tested).
As for next steps, he said he would stick with the FET protocol and give it another go. He also said that it would be ok by him if we wanted to use a gestational carrier. And that he would even allow us to simultaneously transfer to me and to a carrier at the same time so that we could have a greater chance of success and also get through our embryos faster in case there is some other subtle abnormality that keeps them from making live babies.
One major plus, he said no more evil depot lupron needed until 6 months pass from the D&C. Phew. That stuff was terrible for me. The only other thing we need is a hysteroscopy to check that my uterus is scar-free and baby-free post D&C, and he said we could have our local RE here do that.
So lots to think about. Wish we weren't in this position at all. Not sure what we'll do next but good to get as much information as possible before we go forward.
Still hanging in there with the family emergency. Still completely terrible. Still hanging on to knowing that this can't last forever.
Mo
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I hope you get some definite feedback soon from the tests. I am also thinking of you during your family emergency. I hope that everything is okay.
ReplyDeleteThis all sounds so hard. I'm so sorry.
ReplyDeleteHugs.. sorry to hear all this. I am thinking of you in these difficult times. xo
ReplyDeleteI was recently a GS.. so if you have any questions at all.. please email me if ever you feel the need.. les3elles@live.ca
Angele
You sound like you can see a light at the end of the tunnel. Why is it that horrible things happen in bunches? (rhetorical question).
ReplyDeleteKnow we are here for you.
Even though you're having a rough time of it, it sounds like you are trudging your way through. Stay strong, we're praying for you.
ReplyDeleteHey Mo...nice to hear from you. Thinking of you as always.
ReplyDeleteContinued good thoughts headed your way.
ReplyDeleteMo and Will,
ReplyDeleteSo hoping you find peace in your family soon. Keep thinking blues skies ahead...
At least Schl seems open to providing options.
Thinking of you both
xo
Ahh, cytogenetics. I sent my baby's DNA and my blood off for SNP microarray testing too,and yeah the results will be 'interesting'. Right now I'm praying the evil god of technical snags won't slide a foot in.
ReplyDeleteQuestion: are the genetics tests the same one done in the start(ie the same microarray?)
I'm so sorry the family emergency is still looming large, Mo.
Hugs, just hugs. And wishing you both strength which you seem to have lots and lots of. I wish this could be easier for you.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad to hear that you are hanging in there,and that you had a good WTF with the doctor, especially since he still has hope for you.
ReplyDeleteHugs.
I'm glad you are not giving up on your ute. I can't believe Dr Sch is allowing you to transfer to a GC and yourself, hmn, I'm going to ask about that. I so hope things get easier for you soon.
ReplyDeleteHi Mo- I'm a new poster on your blog but I've been following you for a few months. First, let me say I'm very sorry to hear that you are dealing with so much tragedy at one time...it just seems to unfair. My thoughts are with you...and you are right, it can't last forever and it will get better.
ReplyDeleteI guess I'm writing because I too had 6 miscarriages (only 1 tested and it was a chromosomally normal male) and it was after the 6th that we made a big decision that has totally changed our lives. We did decide to use a gestational carrier. It's a hard pill to swallow and it sucks not being able to carry but we have 2 beautiful boys now from it and are finally HAPPY! It's hard to imagine sometimes a life without shots and rollercoasters but I want you to know it's out there...even for people like us!
I'm not pushing getting a surrogate I'm just letting you know it can be a very good option.
Never never never give up...you will be parents!
Heavy shit Mo, but Dr. Schl presents a very interesting option.
ReplyDeleteMo, you've had some real shit come your way - no way around that.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad, however, that Schoolcraft still feels positive (which says SO MUCH for him!) and that should make you feel pretty hopeful too.
Ahhh yes, the surrogacy issue. Hey, for anyone who can afford it - go for it if you wish. And I even like his idea of a double transfer (though you could wind up with two babies at the same time - Yikes!).
Mo-
ReplyDeleteLike Jill said above...I'm a new poster on your blog but I've been following you for a few months.
I too am so very very sorry to hear about your loss. I cried for you and your husband and my heart sank and I had trouble concentrating at work when I read your posts. I’ve been thinking about you since, respecting your silence…understanding your silence… but all the while hoping you will post and let us know how you are….even if it’s not so good. Remember most women suffering a loss of any kind pass though the 5 stages of grieving; Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Acceptance. You may stall out in one area or another or repeat them.. I did many times.
I am 33 years old I had one healthy boy at 25 unplanned to a man who abused me in every way. A few years later I married again to a wonderful man and we desired and longed to be a full time family and have children of our own and step brothers or sisters to my son who lives part time with us. My husband has no children of his own, we wanted many children together never thinking of the road that we would go down trying to be family. In the four short year we have been married we have suffered though 8 miscarriages. Eight. 8 babies who have died. To this day my reproductive endocrinologist and the leading doctor in the U.S. for reoccurring miscarriages and all the other doctors (immune specialists etc) have no known cause for any of them, not one. We have been tested and tested and re-tested my husband and I always come back with ‘normal’ everything. I’ve never been so sad to have tests come back negative…sometimes I wish I had something..Anything then I could blame the condition not knowing is so unbearable. (Not in this order) but I’ve had 2 natural miscarriages, 3 tubal ectopic -1 ruptured tube and 5 D&C’s, 3 Laparoscopic abdominal surgeries. I never make it past 6-8 weeks. We have never seen a heartbeat, and with most D&C’s there was not enough ‘products of conception’ to test. If they did test there was nothing conclusive to give us any ‘chromosome abnormal’ answers we were looking for. Our only hope for a full term child is IVF with PGD to the tune of $19,487.81 which we don’t have and can’t obtain – so for now we are on a fertility break which feels so odd. No doctors, no shots, no lab slips, no OPK’s, no HPT’s, no ovulation tracking, no HCG tracking, no progesterone in oil, no suppositories, no pills, no sonograms every few days, no prescriptions, no countless hours of research, no insurance claims, and no babies…I almost don’t know how to live life without all of it. In 4 years our lives have changes in ways I never would have imagined and we have suffered though so much loss and grief…and yet I still have a dim but flickering light of hope that maybe just maybe..
Ok…I won’t go on and on about me…just wanted you to know my heart understand some of what you’ve felt and I truly wish hope and pray for you.
I like this dr. He's really pulling for you guys, stats be damned. So glad he nixed the depot lupron, and after all you've been through, a hysteroscopy for just a look-see will be a walk in the park. Still ... it sucks that you have to deal with all this. And the family emergency as well. Ummm, actually, sucks is an understatement. Big hug, hon.
ReplyDeleteSending love, hope and healing your way. Xo
ReplyDeleteTotally not making light of the situation but watch your luck change...use your ute and a GS, and both end up with twins. LOL What a story that would be!! Keep your head up. It feels like doom and gloom now but it WON'T stay that way forever.
ReplyDeleteThinking of you in these tough days.
ReplyDeleteYou are in my thoughts often during these dark days. Hope the tests offer some insight and that the next decision is easier for you, whatever it may be. We are here for you.
ReplyDeleteDoing your own FET and using a GC at the same time is interesting. Not saying I'd do it...but it certainly opens up options and shortens the timeframe, which could be a very good thing, particularly if you're thinking about using a GC at some point in the future. From what you've said about Dr. Schl, this sounds like pretty optimistic news all around.
ReplyDeleteStill, I'm so sorry you've been hit with the double whammy of grief and crisis lately. 2011 has to be better, doesn't it?
I don't know exactly what to say but tell you that I had several unexplained m/c's locally then we went to CCRM and did a fresh IVF. We transferred 4 (of which, given my history, at least a few of which should have been normal). I got pregnant with one. At 9 weeks, I miscarried. The genetic testing suggested it was a normal female fetus. We aren't sure that is the case since, arguably, they could have tested my own cells by mistake (normal, female)...but we went ahead and did another IVF cycle, this time with genetic testing. I wasn't sure what to think or what was wrong....I still don't know...but the next one took with an easy and very uneventful pregnancy and beautiful baby. Its a success story, at least. I know my history is different and you've been through A LOT more than me (I'm so sorry) but maybe some things just are unexplained? I don't know how much you have left in you, but maybe one more FET while that depot lupron is still in you is worth it?
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry to hear you are still going through family stuff. I hope that things get better soon.
omg, I'm so sorry for all you're going through. It's good you were able to re-group and talk over options with the doc. I hope all has gone smoothly with the ute and you'll be all clear to go with the FET. I hadn't thought about doing an FET and a gestational carrier at the same time. Thinking of you!
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry that this is such a horrible time for you right now, and I'm glad you had a good conversation with Dr S. I'm hoping that you get the answers you need from the genetic testing and that your next steps are clear. Wishing you all the best and sending a hug.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad to hear that Dr. S is hopeful-- that bodes well. Perhaps while you still have the depot lupron in you and can start taking the pre-emptive shots for Killer T cells, your ute could very well do this; and what an interesting twist to think about a GC too... Good luck and lots of prayers for you and for your family in this difficult time.
ReplyDeleteFirst off, ((((hugs)))) for the continuing family stuff. I hope things begin to settle down soon.
ReplyDeleteSecond, interesting WTF call. How long til you get the genetic results from the d&c? It is a lot to think about, another FET, GC, all of it. Wow. At least no DL for awhile, that is great news.
Good luck wading through it all. I hope some clarity rises to the surface quickly.
As a Sch patient, one thing I like about him is his determination to get you to parenthood one way or another. While GS is a big decision, I felt fortunate that it existed as an option for us. I personally would have found it an easier path than DE, not that it is simple either way. In the meantime, I'm hoping your family crisis improves and that the testing brings answers. You are in the thoughts of so many.
ReplyDelete