Wow! I can't believe we are 28 weeks and 1 day. We are in the third trimester!! 12 weeks maximum to go!
This may sound strange, especially to all those still in the trenches, but I really had not thought we would ever get here. As the IVFs stacked up and the failures and miscarriages mounted, it had begun to feel out of reach - pregnancy beyond 10 weeks, the second trimester a difficult to imagine fantasy, the third trimester not even in the realm of possibility. I think that a sense of futility started to really set in around IVF #5 and our fifth loss. I felt this pervasive sense of hopelessness about ever being able to get out of the situation we found ourselves in.
And here we are...despite everything still going strong. Definitely looking very pregnant now. I promise to try to post a picture later this week...I know many of you have been asking. It is unbelievable to be this pregnant. I try to savor every single moment.
Will and I have been far upstate on a little road trip with Moxie the Boxer since Thursday - I had to give a talk training others in my area of expertise. The talk went well and was well-received, so that was nice, and the setting was absolutely gorgeous. Moxie loved running around in the hills and spent a good amount of time trying to dig up rocks from the shallows of a lake we were staying near (one of her favorite activities).
Here is Moxie leaning up against tree all tuckered out after running her little white socks off during our trip!
In terms of pregnancy, Magpie kicks and squirms up a storm two or three times a day now. I can feel her at multiple places in my belly at once. She's definitely in there, and she doesn't feel so small anymore! She is making her presence known. I think I am having more Braxton Hicks contractions as well, but am not sure, and sometimes am feeling pain around my cervix/low down in my pelvis.
With my increasing size, sleep is getting a bit tougher. I am uncomfortable and must sleep on my side. Left side feels better than the right, but after awhile, my left ear, shoulder, and hip start to go numb and my right calf starts to cramp. At that point, I usually go to the bathroom (again) or at least haul myself over the other side. And it does feel like hauling. My goodness. I may have to invest in one of those long maternity pillows to see if that helps with my nighttime comfort. I have been trying to hold off. Our apartment (and bed) is small and these pillows seem so large...but if it would help, I'm pretty game at this point.
I've been very conscientious about testing my blood glucose levels since I found out about the gestational diabetes. Mostly they have been good, but there have been a couple of meals where the level was much higher than I anticipated. I'm meeting with a nutritionist Wednesday, so am trying to view the interim days between now and then as an information gathering time to learn about what my body can tolerate and what it has trouble with. The couple of times the blood level has been high I have panicked, imagining Magpie at that very moment swelling to huge proportions. Unrealistic perhaps but motivating to try to keep to what seems to work for my body and make sure to add in lots of fiber and some exercise whenever possible. It will be good to learn more about how to achieve this balance while getting in all of the nutrition she (and I) need.
That's about it here for today. We are headed back to NYC shortly. A relaxed Will, ever bigger Mo, and tired and dirty Moxie. Things are pretty good. We are so lucky.
Mo
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Final stretch!!! So awesome. I am so happy for you!
ReplyDeleteI hope, and believe, the herculean efforts that you have gone through will add to your tremendous joy when you bring her home.
I know I don't comment often (though I read always), but I just wanted to say, first of all, I am so, so happy for you to have reached this point. As someone who is very much in the middle of the cycle of futility and helplessness you describe, watching your pregnancy with Magpie unfold has been such an inspiration to me, as it has shown that if you keep persisting, the stars do sometimes eventually align improbably and against the odds to result in that one elusive happy outcome. Cheering you on and waiting happily and hopefully for Magpie's safe arrival in the near (but not TOO near) future!
ReplyDeleteOh, I'm just so happy for you! 9 weeks to full term!!!
ReplyDeleteI found that a regular body-length pillow worked much better than those maternity ones (which were designed for people at least 6 inches taller than me).
I used multiple pillows instead of one big body pillow... one under my belly, one under my knees, etc... They helped, but I suspect that a body pillow would have been better. Certainly I was horrendously sleep deprived by the time the baby arrived!
ReplyDeleteBut it's such a thrill to 'see' you get to this stage. What a great reason to be losing sleep!
The world is right and everything is as it should be (GD notwithstanding) for you, Will, and Magpie. As a LONG time reader and someone who has willed you to continue on your journey in spite of cycle failures and losses, it does my heart good to see how far you've come.
ReplyDeleteI can't wait to see this space evolve once baby girl arrives and you adjust to being a mother of a live child and a family of three (four, including Miss Moxie). I dare say that that adjustment will come with its own surprises. As a fellow infertile who is a mother to a now 5 year old boy, my journey to #2, still in process, has taught me so much about my own infertility and mettle.
Godspeed to you!
Congratulations!
ReplyDeleteIt's not surprising that you never imagined being here. After such a long battle, a perfect outcome really does just seem like a fantasy.
Here's the next one: In 3 short months, you will be holding your daughter in your arms.
I would suggest getting your home ready sooner than later (I wanted to wait until full term only to end up on bedrest at 35 weeks).
Congrats on reaching the third tri! And definitely go for the pillow -- I actually felt like I took up less space in the bed because I didn't thrash around so much.
ReplyDeleteI know exactly what you mean about the 3rd tri - we finally made it after 8 years and 6 losses (all 1st tri) and it was so surreal. And I still get that feeling, now I have a 19 month old toddler - I look at the toys in the living room and think "wow - it actually happened!". So, so happy for you!
ReplyDeleteWahoo!! So delighted that you're at this point.
ReplyDeleteI finally caved and got one of those maternity pillows and it was great. Plus I used it as a substitute nursing pillow for awhile.
So very glad to see that you are here-- I know that a nursing pillow was one of the better investments I made, even if my spouse felt like I was crowding him out of the bed somewhat. Will continue to cheer for you until Ms. Magpie makes her big debut!
ReplyDeleteThat pregnancy pillow was AWESOME! Mine was kind of J-shaped. I think if I had to do it again, I'd get the one that is U shaped, because when you turn over, you have to flip the entire thing and you know, whap your husband... haha! Although the U shaped one probably takes more bed space in general. But I did seriously love mine, and would totally spend the $50 or some odd dollars again. Some people use it for nursing afterward. I donated mine.
ReplyDeleteCongrats on making it to the 3rd trimester!!!
Totally get a pregnancy pillow!!! I loved mine, and for the amount of bed rest I was on with my twin pregnancy (after 3 years of ttc and treatments and procedures) it made a world of difference.
ReplyDeleteCongratulations. So happy for you. 82 days to go.
ReplyDeleteThis post makes me happy.
ReplyDeleteCongrats! I am sorry to hear about the Gestational Diabetes -- it scared me a lot to find out I had it, but I was surprised by how (relatively) easy it ended up being to manage with diet. It was also kind of cool to get a 'pass' from the nutritionist to eat things like real full-fat ice cream versus stuff like Tasti-Delite (fat/protein balanced out the sugar). I also ate a lot of string cheese and nuts.
ReplyDeleteThe worrying about having 'too big' a baby (and needing a c-section, etc) probably scared me the most, but my son ended up weighing just under 7 lbs and was delivered vaginally. He came on his own the morning before I was supposed to be induced (how's that for luck after years of bad IF luck). Those last weeks with all the non-stress tests can be tough, but I also found it very comforting to spend that time with my baby.
Anyway, very, very, very excited for you and wishing you all the best!
I love love love my body pillow and still use it--it really helped. Many congradulations on making it to 3T-- you're almost there!
ReplyDeleteYou are going to MAKE THE DAY for the nutritionist as the best most informed and tracking already patient. You are being so pro-active. Keep hydrated, it will help your body and it is surprisingly easy to not drink enough water when pregnant in 3rd trimester and that can, in some cases, add to any tendency to go into labor earlier than intended. And, in labor being hydrated is crucial.
ReplyDeleteYou 4 are all doing wonderfully well and such joy awaits.
I've been following you for a long time, and although I'm not a frequent commenter, I just have to say how thrilled I am for you that you've made it to the 3rd trimester!! I know how hard it is to balance the thoughts that this could end at any second with the amazement of being pregnant. I look back now at my pregnancy as having been one of the happiest times of my life, although I know that I worried for a lot of it. But, somehow, in retrospect, that all disappeared and I remember the pregnancy as a wonderful time. I think you're finding some enjoyment in the moment - and I know you will looking back on it too! Take care! You're almost there!
ReplyDeleteYay for getting to the third trimester!
ReplyDeleteI also had a hard time believing our pregnancy was trucking along, and we only had one loss before that. I think it was mostly the years it took to get to that point. I was so afraid to jinx it that I even put off registering as long as I could, until my shower host finally ordered me to do it.
As for nighttime support, I managed to sleep during my triplet pregnancy with just a wedge under my belly and a regular bed pillow between my knees-to-ankles. Things still got sore periodically throughout the night, but in between those times I was comfortable. The wedge was initially too stiff to be comfortable under my belly and I used it as back support while sitting on the couch. That gave it a nice curve and then it worked for both my belly and back.