Sunday, March 21, 2010

Sundays of grace #24

1. It's been winter for so long it seems, and now - seemingly out of nowhere - it is full on springtime. Green grass and crocuses and daffodils blooming. A warm breeze and sunshine, people lazing about in the park, reading on the grass, no coats, no jackets even. How did that happen? An amazing transformation.

2. Hope. It has been in such short supply since August, when we lost our fifth pregnancy. Even doing this latest IVF cycle, I had to drag myself through the motions of the stimulation, the monitoring, unable to believe that anything could go right. And fearing that if my heart was so damaged that I had no hope, it couldn't possibly turn out ok. And yet. We had a great retrieval. And somehow the Denver lab has made us so many blasts to test with microarray that I can hardly believe it. And there it is...hope, creeping timidly in, that maybe, just maybe, we could have a family. Hope, you terrify me. And I feel so fortunate to see you again.

3. Will has so much going on - his father is sick, his work is ridiculously stressful right now - and yet he not only physically showed up to do his part to make all this a success, he's been consistently emotionally showing up as well, standing beside me, with me. Making me believe that together we can get through anything. Being present, even when it is hard to do. What a gift. Thank you, Will. I am so grateful for your courage. For your presence here beside me.


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  1. Spring bring great hope doesn't it? You've got a good man there Mo!

  2. It is so beautiful in NY today. I am glad hope is creeping back into your life. I am pulling for you. Us 6 timers gotta stick together!

  3. Mo - I can't believe how well the embies are doing! Praying with my whole heart that you get every one of them testing perfectly. And those NYers are naturally stubborn, they will come in their own good time! I am so glad the labs at #1 are making such a difference for you. Take care

  4. Yay for Spring and hope! I am hoping the biopsies go really well tomorrow.

  5. Hooray for Spring-- new life! Clearly you and Will have a resilient relationship that can make great things happen.

  6. I think I may be in love with your family.

    And thank GOODNESS it's spring!


  7. hi. thank you for your support. Happy to read about your embryos! it is amazing how resilient hope is, and thank goodness for hope.

  8. Spring is wonderful!!!!



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