Friday, September 25, 2015

Rolls Royce ultrasound at 6w5d

We were fit in today for an early morning ultrasound with a higher definition machine. Thankfully.

The resolution was so much better.

The OB radiologist said he saw what he would expect to see with a sac this size. He clearly visualized a yolk sac, and said the gestational sac is measuring about a week behind, but that this doesn't trouble him significantly because frozen transfers can be behind (not sure they can be a week behind, but I wasn't going to quibble with him).

6w5d ultrasound of uncertain viability-
The little speck in the middle is the top of the yolk sac,
which was clearly visualized but not showing up so great in this picture.
Looking at the picture, it's hard to believe that there's a yolk sac there, but two radiologists and an ultrasonographer concurred that it was definitely there, and obvious to them across multiple images. This particular area of the hospital doesn't have the monitors set up for patients to see (no extra monitors, no printing capability). so this is just an iphone image one of the doctors took for me of one of the images.

The OB radiologist said not to come back this Tuesday - that it is too early to see much change. So I am scheduled to return a week from Monday, on October 5th.

It seems a lifetime from now, but if there's going to be cardiac activity, we should see it by that point.

I was thrilled that there was a yolk sac. I thought we weren't even going to make it to that stage. I don't know what to make of the fact that everything is measuring small. But it's premature to call this over yet, and so we will wait.

I woke up at dawn this morning feeling very detached from my life, like I was at a great distance looking at my family, career, the whole of my existence. It wasn't unpleasant, more peaceful to see things from a remove. That sense has passed as I've gotten whipped into the various tasks of the day, but it was an interesting experience.

Not sure how I'll survive the long wait until October 5th. And I'm not feeling very hopeful, if I'm being honest. But I do like that either way, we'll have a better sense of where things stand by that next ultrasound.

For now, more waiting, as I attempt to hang onto my sanity.

Mo

PS - anyone ever seen a pregnancy this far off course successfully turn around? I would welcome ANY positive stories at this point. Thanks.

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23 comments:

  1. Oh my gosh! October 5 is SO far away! I am so glad they got you in today, though. I'm glad you had several people give their opinions as well. I so want this for you and I am praying that when you go back on the 5th, there will be a precious, strong heartbeat. I'm so sorry you are in this limbo. It is agonizing.

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  2. Oh, Mo….I wish things were more clear for you. Limbo is the worst. Hang in there. Still praying for a miracle for you. Hugs

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  3. thanks so much for sharing this update mo...

    i think it is good to schedule out, because it will be much more definitive...
    it is not that far away. this weekend, have a nice family time with your sweeties.
    then, a week of work... distraction!
    then, another weekend, and then... you will know.

    keep in touch with your heart, mo... not so much the details of *this* pregnancy attempt, but the grander picture... being open to adding to your family...
    there is no timeline, and if your heart is open, it makes it go so much smoother...

    i am on the cusp of age 47, with a 18m old, and from my POV, you have time, options, and the best thing is, you have magpie.

    stay strong mo!!

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  4. I am so relieved at least that you did not get bad news today. It will be a tortuously long wait until the next ultrasound. I hope life keeps you busy. Wishing you the best!

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  5. I'm sorry you're still in limbo. No way you can get in sooner?

    I know everyone has stories....mine cancel each other out. My first pregnancy had a small sac and never developed beyond that, despite normal betas. And then there was Tiny Boy, who made it despite the odds.

    I wish you the same happy ending. And some peace during this next week.

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  6. Hang in there Mo, one day at a time. I am more hopeful after this ultrasound, maybe by next week it will have caught up growth wise and with a HB :) Is there any way they could fit you in next Fri instead of Mon so you don't have to go through 2 weekends instead of 1 waiting?

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  7. Addendum to my previous comment...sorry. I should clarify that while Tiny Boy's sac was small (at one scary point about 2 weeks behind), the pregnancy met other ultrasound benchmarks on time, including cardiac activity by 6w2d.

    Still... hoping for the best outcome here as well!

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  8. I'm sorry you haven't gotten a definitive answer. I know that the waiting feels like torture.

    Abiding with you as you wait.

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  9. Ugh that is so far away! I would try to get in sooner...if the news is bad (I hope not!) better to not suffer in limbo. 10/5 is 8w2d--seems you could get a definitive answer in the 7w range, espec. on a RR machine.

    Blimey, I was really hoping for good news. I hope the time before your next u/s passes quickly for you (gah).

    Has ccrm weighed in on the ultrasounds?

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  10. Sigh. I hate wishing time away, but I hope October 5th rolls around quickly for you.

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  11. I see this ultrasound as positive thing! From the initial hcg levels it looks like you had late implanter and with that in mind it make sense to see some lagging. What was the gestational age based on the measurement? Did they provided this information to you? I truly hope that this pregnancy will yield another success as time progress. Take care of yourself and stay busy.... Hugs!!!

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  12. First off, "Go, little embryo, GO!" Cheerleading out of the way, I'd say I hope you can get through this next week without too much loss of sanity. Ugh.

    I'd say a visible yolk sac is a very good sign at this point, and implantation time can just be wonky with FETs. It CAN be later, that's well documented, and that DOESN'T seem to make a difference with outcome. So if it were me, I'd go on with the assumption that this embryo implanted later than typical. And if that's the case, it's right where it should be, development wise.

    And in case any deities large or small are out there are listening for requests from another confirmed agnostic, a little miracle boost over here for Mo would be ever so much appreciated! Thinking of you in this miserably tough time.

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  13. Yay on the yolk sac! I concur with Susan, that's a very good sign I think. I know the wait is torture. I'm a confirmed agnostic too, but am hoping and sending tons of good thoughts (as the Pope suggested yesterday in his address!) Go embie go!

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  14. Pulling for you. A week seems so far away. I hate early pregnancy if for nothing else than the fact that time seems to crawl by. Take it one day at a time.

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  15. Mo! This is exactly what I meant when I said yesterday that, "the truth of the matter is that the only clear answer at this point in time (even in the best case scenario) is an answer of no. This early, the only other answer is always a maybe." Today's maybe looks good and strong to me. Hang in there. Can you do something kind for yourself? A good distracting book? Some nice dark chocolate?

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  16. My personal experience is that when things seem significantly behind, the results end up bad (in my first pregnancy we also measured a week or so behind and we did eventually see a fetal pole with heart beat but still went on to miscarry at 9w5d). However, I did find this optimistic story while Google searching for you

    " I had the same thing at 6w4d where they saw a yolk sac but no fetal pole (immediately following a miscarriage, so I was already on edge). My HCG that day came back at 60,000, and they told me that since they should "definitely" see a heartbeat at a level of 6,500, this was another MC and I should book a D&C. I requested another US first, and a mere two days later, I had a perfect fetal pole measuring exactly the expected 6w6d and a good strong heartbeat! I'm 16 wks now. " -- so hopefully you will have this good luck!!!!

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    1. thanks for finding this for me! i really appreciate it! you're unbelievable!

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  17. Ahhhhh! I saw this after I saw your beta results. Things are still looking good, IMO.

    Gah, 10/5 is SOOOOOOOO far away, but you are right that by then things will be definitive. I hope that you manage to stay sane and that nothing concerning crops up between now and then (you know there is the possibility of spotting/bleeding at 8 wks (when your regular period would have been due)), so hang in as best you can. You have ALL my best thoughts.

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  18. Another thing to add my my positive "off track" story I wrote about on your other post was that at the time they saw the empty gestational sac my HCG was over 18,000! So adding that to my story makes it even crazier. Hoping you also get a baby that didn't feel the need to "follow the rules" - sending good thoughts!

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    1. wow! thank you for sharing that. so glad it worked out for you!

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  19. I had a "surprise" pregnancy following years of IVF and fertility treatments and I ended up in the ER with unbearable right ovarian pain. When they did the ultrasound I should have been 6w2d, but my sac only measured around 5.5 weeks. They sent me home with a note saying I should expect to "spontaneously abort". I was crushed and expecting the worst, but wouldn't you know, that little bean was just a late implanter! We eventually saw a fetal pole and HB and that little bean was born at 40w5d! He's 2 now. Praying for a miracle and a similar story for you. Don't count yourself out!

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  20. While my story is not the same as yours, I thought I would share in hopes that it will be encouraging anyway. After 11 years of trying, my husband and I learned were were pregnant on our own last year. That baby's heart stopped beating at 9 weeks and we were, of course, devastated. Fast forward to May of this year when we once again learned we were expecting. Went in for my 6 week apt. and ultrasound to be told that while they could see the gestational sac and yolk sac, they could not see a baby or a heartbeat. There was a tiny flickering at the edge of the gestational sac that the tech said could possibly be a heartbeat, but couldn't verify as there was no fetal pole to be seen. My doctor was not optimistic and tried to prepare me for a second miscarriage. My hcg level at this point was 54,000. However, he scheduled a follow up ultrasound for the following week. It turns out that God had other plans. At our follow up ultrasound there was baby with a great heartbeat measuring 7 weeks!! I'm currently 24 weeks pregnant with a little girl and pray daily that she will be born healthy and full-term. While I realize that my story is different as we didn't conceive through fertility treatments, I hope it will encourage you not to throw in the towel just yet!

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